25 Ways to Respond When Someone Asks Why You're Still Single 你為什麼還單身的25種回答
I cannot tell you how many times I have
been called upon to explain my utter and complete lack of boyfriend. Typically,
I alternate between two main responses, which are 1) shrugging and 2) making
noncommittal mouth sounds.
我數不出來我被問了多少次為什麼我沒有男朋友，基本上，我有兩種回答，分別是1)聳肩和2)用嘴巴發出不表態的聲音。
It almost always happens at family
parties, and the question usually comes after "How's school?" but
before "How is [friend I haven’t spoken to in about ten years and who
may as well be dead to me]?"
這種情形常常在家庭聚會時常常發生，而且這些問題通常都會在問完「在學校過得怎麼樣？」之後接著，但會在「那個（十年沒說過半句話對我而言如同死人一般的朋友）過得怎麼樣？」的問題之前。
You’ve been there. I can tell. But hey, since we’re going to be parrying these
questions at every family gathering and holiday party from now until the day we
die, we might as well be ready. So when they ask "When are you ever going
to bring a boy around for us to meet?", you simply say…
你一定被問過，我看得出來。但是，嘿，與其我們從現在到老死，都得在家庭聚會或是節慶派對上迴避這些問題，我們也可以做好準備，那麼當他們問「你什麼時候要帶男朋友回來給我們認識？」你只需要說…。
1. Tis neither here nor there.
（這不重要）
2. The more I know of the world, the more I
am convinced that I shall never see a man whom I can really love.
（世間的事懂得越多，越覺得我應該找不到我愛的男人。）
3. I am too blunt and saucy.
（我太遲鈍又太粗魯了）
4. I am pigeon-liver'd and lack gall.
（事理不明—出自莎士比亞）
5. My good opinion, once lost,
is lost forever.
（我對於某個人一旦沒有了好感，就永遠不會有好感了。）
6. I have never been in love; it is not my way,
or my nature.
（我從來沒有愛過，這不是我的風格，這不是我。）
7. I care for no man on earth, and no man on earth cares for me.
（我不在乎地球上的任何男人，也沒有人在乎我。）
8. They're a rotten crowd.
（他們是一群爛人）
9. Cows are my passion. What I have ever sighed for,
has been to retreat to a Swiss farm, and live entirely surrounded by cows.
（我超愛牛兒們，我所感嘆的一切事物將被送到瑞士的農場，然後被牛群環繞。）
10. [Exeunt, pursued by a bear.]
〔像是被熊追一樣光速退場〕
11. Ask me not.
（別問我）
12. Darkness and devils!
（噢，你像魔鬼一樣陰險邪惡）--出自莎士比亞《李爾王》
13. Whenever you feel like criticizing any one, just
remember that all the people in this world haven't had the advantages that
you've had.
（當你想要批評任何人的時候，只要記得世界上所有的人都沒有你所擁有的優點。）
14. I am no bird; and no net ensnares me: I am a free
human being with an independent will.
（我不是隻鳥，沒有巢可以誘捕我，我是個擁有獨立意志的自由人類）
15. I am becoming more and more attracted by the gay side of
life.
（我越來越覺得成為一個同性戀也沒什麼不好。）
16. Not all those who wander are lost.
（徘徊的人未必都在迷途上。）
17. I could not be happy with a man whose taste did not in every point coincide with my own.
（我跟這些品味沒有剛好符合我的人在一起並不會快樂。）
18. That little word
"why" has run through all universe from the first day of
creation...and for seven thousand years it has had no answer.
（這個小小的「為什麼」打從宇宙被創造的第一天就運行了…而七千多年來都沒有答案。）
19. I always deserve the best treatment because I never put up with any other.
（我一直值得最好的待遇，因為我永遠不需要容任別人）
20. Anybody between fifteen and thirty may
have me for asking.
（任何介於15到30歲的人都喜歡這麼問我）
21. Oft expectation fails, and most oft
there where most it promises.
（通常伴隨著承諾的期待都會落空。）
22. Men don't interest me. No—women neither.
（男人都對我沒興趣，女人也是。）
23. The worst of having a romance of any kind is that it
leaves one so unromantic.
（任何羅曼史最糟的狀況就是以如此不羅曼蒂克的方式結束。）
24. I am unlike other people, I dare say.
（我敢說，我不喜歡別人。）
25. Let me be boiled to death with melancholy.
（讓我帶著悲傷被烹刑至死吧。）
